Welcome to Orlando.

It’s just about done — whoops, sorry it is. Peter Kalikow, Woody Johnson, and Mike Bloomberg have bent the collective we over a canoe and announced:
I’m gonna make you squeal like a pig.” This should dispel those pesky rumors that the MTA is something other than corrupt ($200MM in overruns to a limo driver rehabbing your headquarters), incompetent (taking $50MM today over $400MM), or lackeys for scrabbling politicos who are both tone deaf (Mike-Mike) and astoundingly craven (Curious George). Pulling some numbers from the claims in the New Yorker article, if everything goes exactly as planned, in about 10 years, this billion-dollar-plus investment (excluding the 7 line extension) on the part of the city will net — wait for it — almost $5MM dollars a year in net tax revenue! Hey, Mike, give me a billion and see if I can produce those same numbers. I think I could. You know how? I’d buy NYC munis, the rating of which should tank once details of this deal are revealed (if they even are — if you are going to steal from the city all Tammany-style, it’s best to hide in the back room), and yields skyrocket. You have to figure Woody has some kind of dirt to railroad a deal like this through. Given the family fortune, it probably involves a lot of K-Y, which we are all going to need, whether it’s to love the pounding our tax rates are going to take, or the lube we’ll need to navigate the West Side as all the Jerseyites who actually are the Jets’ fan base worm their way home each Sunday in the fall.

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